Leanne’s Easy Peasy Lemon Cake

So here is another recipe for you all.

My son and I like to bake cakes and experiment often and this is one of those outcomes. Now before you start, I would advise you to pre-whisk your egg whites (you know like a proper baker would do) if you want a fluffier risen cake, but as 1 – my mixer blew up a couple months ago ( I swear I did nothing) and 2 – I am lazy and it gives me shoulder ache( well, it does). I just dumped all my ingredients in, wet first, dry second and hoped for the best. That’s where the ‘easy peasy’ comes in.
The result is it doesn’t rise as much as most cakes, but then again it is a small amount of batter so it’s not too bad. It still tastes great (and edible) and my kids wolfed it down.

I particularly like it too, and with a cup of tea and my knitting. I was a happy chappy.

You will need –

A child…… optional but in my case I use my son as slave labour for all the icky things I do not want to do. Like grease baking tins, or cutting circular grease paper. Also dishes.

For the cake –

250g Butter
250g Self Raising Flour (I like to call this the lazy persons flour)
250g White Sugar
4 eggs
2 teaspoons lemon extract
2 large tablespoons of sprinkles if you want to be as cool as us and pretend it’s a party in a cake. We chose pastels as you know, chic and cute all in one.
Some lemon curd (in a jar from our local Tesco, cos I am good like that) or you can be posh and make it yourself but you may need to find someone who can actually cook to advise you on the how.

Method (don’t laugh) –

Okay may I remind you as previously mentioned – Lazy. Broken mixer. No baking skills.

Toss your butter and sugar in a bowl and whisk like your life depends on it. (You can shake your ass and fit in some swats about now)
Add your eggs (not separated, whisked and floofy like a pro. Please!)
Whisk once again, I hear it builds wrist muscles and you want to be working off the cake you will inhale when it is ready.
Add your lemon yumminess (the essence, not an actual lemon, I am not that posh.)
Now chuck in your flour gradually (that would be small amounts at a time), whisking as you go (I know, it’s total sacrilege that I didn’t even sift it for goodness sake.)
Don’t over mix your flour as someone intelligent told me that’s bad for cakes and will mess with your flour. Believe the cook, don’t listen to me……it just works better that way.
You have a thick gloopy and somewhat tasty batter once it is all incorporated (oooh long word.) I may or may not have eaten some….a lot. Licked spoons, and bowls and left my face in the state most toddlers learning to eat soup for the first time do.
Chuck in one of your tablespoons (party in a cake) sprinkles and stir in. We need that added pizzazz.
Now get your two greased (by the slave child I keep in the dark for such tasks) baking tins. Divide the mixture between them and slam the crap out of them onto your surface to level them out. (or maybe just spread it gently like most would do.) I opt for slamming as you can really emotionally work through all those daily grievances in such a healthy way.
You know the ‘why can’t he put the loo seat down!!!’
Put it on the top(ish) rack of your preheated(don’t make me laugh) oven. I am going to say gas mark 4.5 as I really didn’t turn it all the way and then remembered ten minutes in and turned it all the way to 5 (rebel)
Now a timer would be advisable but as I live dangerously and like to time things by intuition and fire alarms I suggest you check it after 20 minutes (unless it looks like it may be on fire) . Poke it with some sharp pointy tool to see if it is cooked to the bottom. Clean if it is…. ashy and black if it’s over cooked.
Take out and leave to cool.
While basking in the knowledge you just gave Nigella a run for her money and should be opening your own bakery, I would like to share the icing recipe.

Icing (it tastes good even if it was made by my hands)

In a rather lovely little bowl. All by myself as the child ran off by this point.
Chuck the following in it. (add some extravagant dramatic tosses for effect)

100g room temp butter (fancy schmancy)
200g Icing sugar
1 teaspoon lemon essence
1 tablespoon milk
Now whisk like you want your shoulder to dislocate and it’s all so creamy and yummy. It’s foolproof, trust me. I know.

Take your cake (now cooled and remembering to remove grease proof paper from base – don’t ask or I will have flashbacks)
Spread a layer of lemon curd on one of the cakes. Thickness depends on how much you want to use but we tend to spread it about the same as we put on toast. Except if you ask Chloe, don’t use Chloe’s measurements as she uses a jar over 4 slices on a good day.
Plop the other cake on top (we are going for edible and not fancy)
Spread your buttery lemony icing all over the top, and the sides and plate, floor, hair, hands, face……sorry. Just the cake will do (Right, Zack??? He came back to help and I am now eye rolling with a cloth in hand and contemplating needing more icing)
While the icing is still ‘moist’ (I know you hate that word) chuck on your other tablespoon of sprinkles. Like a wizard throwing pixie dust into an assailants eyes.
Aim for the cake though and not as Zack does which is mostly on the floor. (Might need more of those too then)
Now your masterpiece is complete and you have to take the quickest non styled picture in history before your kids start eating it with their hands ( I raise feral offspring. Blame their father for leaving me unattended in their developmental years for this thing called a job)

I suggest slicing it up, like normal humans do.



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